Comics by Shaenon II

[Desius]

"Well...." said Bob flatly, "I think that this is a bit much."
"Hrmph." agreed Joe, eyeing the corridor of desturction down the the walkway and through the yard and down the street and...
Oh dear, there goes the local High School. And that poor packed bus idling next to that gas tanker in that intersection, they need to move it, well, at least the half still there before...
BOOM!
Joe felt the shockwave and nodded to himself. Nevermind.
"I think..." mumbled Bob, risking a glance into the house. "I think we'll say out here."
Joe nodded.
"Mr. Blazerflarey?" Bob called, cupping his hands and shouting. "We got a delivery for you. Fresh onions and liver!"
"Goose." added Joe.
"What?"
"The liver." said Joe. "It's goose's."
"What else would it be?" asked Bob.

[blazerflarey]

Hmm... there is someone at the door. I walk towards the doorway and stop before the two figures that appear before me as silhouettes. I hear what they say. "A Question, sirs. I do not remember ordering, anything, and I probably would not have ordered, liver. The question is how much do I have to pay you two fellows to go away."

[Desius]

"Hrmph. Polite." grunted Joe.
"He shot at me!" disagreed Bob, pointing his finger at the slightly distracted Mad.
"Hrmph?"
"I don't care if you... wait." Bob stopped mid-rant turning to eyeball the young man. "Did you just say 'pay?'"
"Hrmph." shrugged Joe, kindly moving his friend out of the way, and lifting up the metal box they used to transport deliveries. Biohazard stickers, layered five thick and worn smooth and faded, adorned the box, as the attached geiger counter flicked and crackled periodically.
"Hrmph. Order. Paid in full. Take it."
"Now, now, don't be so hasty, my stoic friend." wheedled Bob, draping his arm over Joe's shoulder. "perhaps we could just... 'misplace' this order."
"Job's not done." said Joe sternly.
"Look kid," Bob said to Blaze, "I know Joe here. When he digs in his heels, we ain't going to move him."
"Buuutttt...." dragged out Bob, rolling his head at Blaze, " I have a solution. You don't think you placed an order for liver? Coo..., fine by me, someone made a mistake. Old Joe here, however, is gonna be mighty sore if you don't take it and eat it. But, come back with us to the resturant, you can reorder your meal, say it's a mistake and all, Joe'll be happy, and you'll get a free meal at the worst. I imagine you could use some meat on your bones anyway, son." Bob added looking at the young Mad, "Who knows, you might even like it, become a regular. I know quite a few Mads who've done just that."
Bob gave his widest sunniest smile, the kind that can light a city for a week. "Waddya say?"

[blazerflarey]

"Alright I will come with you. By the way the reason I do not believe that I made such an order is simply because I am a picky eater, I did not mean any insults. Just a quick question is it alright if I bring my attempt of an anti-gravity ray-gun along?"

[Desius]

"Weeeeelllllllll....." Bob said with a sunny smile, drawing out the word as he steered he uptight young man towards the car, "I don't see much problems with that now, you can bring a whole tool-kit if you please."
Bob leaned close, his breath smelling of garlic and cloves, "Just, uh, remember, Gamsey's pub is a bit of a... whatchamacallit's." He leaned back and shouted, "Hey Joe, whats one of those places, you know, with one of those non-agression pacts or something?"
"Hrmph."
"Ya, one of those." he beamed, "Its a neutral territory thing going on. No one harms any one else really. Well sort of. I mean we enjoy a rousing barfight and all. And it is one of the local classic assasination spots around here. It's got maps and everything, guided tour every tuesday! Just uh, stick to shooting them or using a knife. And, uh, whatever you do, don't touch the food. Gamsey's gets Reeaaallll peculiar if you play around with his food. Poison it or something... and whooo-eeee he gets all mad."
"Hrmph."
"Ya, they still haven't found that poor sap." Bob shruged, "He uh, put catsup on the eggs. The condiments are just for show. You don't ever, ever put anything on the food other than what Gamsey puts on it. If you want something, tell him, it's uh a local cuisine or something and he'll do it for you. Nice man and all, but very pecuilar with his food."
"And what ever you do, never, NEVER, NEVER, NEVER... oh we're here!" Bob beamed and waved him inside.

[runingwolfin]

((OOC: I hope you don't mind, but I was wondering if a strange failed experiment may join. *fiddles with a little dimensional time disruptor while waiting for a reply))

[Professor Zobot]

Well, it ain't my place to say whether or not you get to join the game or not, but if you give us more information about your character, it would probably help. SiB's criteria for Blazerfirey joining was to write a test paragraph of your character doing something mad science-ish, so you might want to include that.

Basically, you'd have to have SiB's say-so to get in on the fun, but the more detail you give us beforehand, the more likely a chance you'll have to get in.

Being active around the forum also helps, so feel free to post in the Mad Scientist lounge if you feel you have anything to add on.

And of course, you can always post in the practice wars. If we get a few more people wanting to join, you guys could even play around a bit before you get invited.

Good to see ya, hope you get invited!

So what's your character like?

[Desius]

Fell free to post here if you'd like, my offer to play around with anyone here still stands. If you want, I can lead off, or you can start and I'll respond. Gamsey and crew await!

[runingwolfin]

(( Ok. I'll be around here a lot, and I'll post here and there every now and then ^.^

Ok. My character is a failed experiment. She was meant to be the first human turned into a powerful wolf. As previously stated, it was a failure, and she is stuck as being a werewolf look. She is kind when she pays attention to others, and tends to bring trouble where she goes. She likes to build dangerous inventions, and they work about half of the time or less. She is not afraid to use the people around her as guinea pigs as that is what happened to her. Her name before the change was Spirit, but she now goes by wolfin. Wolfin has a sensitive nose, so she tends to leave a lab right before it blows up or so, but she also leaves when there is any strong smell. She is not weak against silver or anything, but she hates it when someone holds silver to her. They tend to do that a lot, and She also can't eat a lot of fruits and vegetables which she used to love.

Wolfin is laid back if she knows you, but really jumpy and nervous until she gets to know you. Wolfin tends to sleep during the day when most of the scientest are awake, so she's the one that would wake everyone up at mid-night screaming about a huge chemical fire.

[Professor Zobot]

Yeah, this time I'd be willing to make a character and meddle a bit to help pass the time as well.

Heck, if it's good enough, it might even follow you into the main game!

[runingwolfin]

Wolfin was looking in awe as she made her way along her new lab. Her last one was blown to bits by a person who won't be named. Her face lit up as she saw her old hair dye ray gun. The thing never dyed hair, but it did cut bread well. It was her favorite bread cutter. She took a seat and started working on fixing it back to do it's original function, dyeing hair.


((Such quick replies ^.^ Thanks The lab is behind doors which are open right now.))

[Desius]

"Oh, bugrit," muttered Bob. "Millennium Hand and Shrimp!" he added for good measure.
"Bugrit!" the man next to him exclaimed, his stench pausing in the beating of another refuge to glare at Bob.
"What?!"
"That's our line!*" snarled the little dog on the leash held in the beggars hand.
"Well, I had it first! You wanna pick a fi...ight o-over it?" Bob started before he stared down the gaseous smell towering above him, who kindly slipped on a pair of knuckles and cracked his hand expectantly.
"Hrrmph." stated Joe, his hand landing solidly on Bob's head.
"Ahh... umm... sorry." Bob muttered sheepily, while the three beggars nodded sagely at the advice.
The beat-up old pickup slowed down ad crawled to a stop at the light. "This is our exit." Muttered the dog who was lifted up and the beggar and his dog climbed out.
"Hey!" yelled Bob, "what about him!" He pointed to the smell, corroding the wooden planks along the truck bed and rusting ou tthe metal siding.
"Bugrit. Millennium Hand and Shrimp!"

Gamsey whistled happily as the three pulled away from the highway and drove into the small quiet suburb. Shame about sweet dear Regina, he thought, well, she'll be up and about in no time. Her master was a whiz at the old lightning rods, and there was plently left for a good ole'-fashioned resurrection.
Bob sighed and pounded the cab. "You know, Gamesy." he started, "He only added a bit of salt to it. Even I could tell you that it needed a little more."
"Never my good man," Gamesy cackled, swerving the truck through a turn, forcing Joe and Bob to hold on for dear life. "Men of such philistine tastes, lacking the wisdom of the ages, and untried in the mysteries of the cooking gods should never dare to comment on the complexities and joys... hold on, car." He said, swerving wildly, the cab scratching along the darkened street, sparks flying as they narrowly dodged the oncomng car and scraped along the building fronts.
"IT'S A ONE WAY STREET GAMESY!"
"I know!" chuckled the Mad. "How can you expect me not to notice-"
"GOING THE OPPOSITE WAY!"
"Oh hush you," Gamesey chided, swerving again to dodge the startled traffic. "This is what I'm talking about. Such untrained paletes should never judge the works of an obvious master. I mean, I take great pains to accept and conform to local cusines, but never have I been so insulted in my life. The nerve of young blaze... whatever his name was. Salt, as if my cusine wasn't perfection sent from above."
"Oh," he giggled, "We're here."
The pickup rocked forward, hissing smoke and steam as the two assistants stumbled numbly to the floor. Joe hugged it dearly, while Bob stuttered at his boss.
"Don't you think you went a little overboard for SALT!" Bob exclaimed pointing a shaking finger at gamesy who sniffed.
The truck fell apart, collapsing in a hulk as it gave one final whimper and expired.
"I think not." sniffed Gamesy, "I was extremly careful to only show the exact minimum amount of displeasure the event required. He was, after all only a new customer. I think he simply wasn't prepared for such fine cusine."
"You...You.." Bob sputtered, "You nuked a square kilometer!"
"Not nuked, it's only slightly radioactive." explained Gamesy patting himself for his keys before swinging open his new diner. "Besides, that was onlybecuase the oven blew. That young man's rebuttal to my comment was a tad extreme for such an action if I do say so myself."
"Hrmph."
"How was I supposed to know his gun wasn't fully functional yet?" lamented Gamesy, "I didn't know he was only a child, fresh, untested-"
"Hrmph." grunted Joe folding him arms as they stepped inside.
"So I admit I invited him for a free meal, it was only corteous, but."
"Hrmph."
Oh very well." sighed Gamesy. "Let me start up the oven, make a few adjustments, and then lets invite the neighbors."
"I always need to restock after a move," He giggled to himself.

The smells, powerful and pervasive filtered into the town wafting on the wind and into the open door of a certain lab. The mouth-watering smell of fresh meat hung and beckoned in the air.


*Foul Ole' Ron and Gaspode courtesy of Terry Pratchett. Please don't sue me.

[runingwolfin]

"Something smells good, I wonder if they would mind for me to drop by?" Wolfin placed down the bread cutter, and made her way outside. She gave a cough as she choked on how strong the smell was, but it was mouth watering. She made her way over to the new place, and looked at how it was set up. She decided she should knock or something to announce that she was here. She gave a knock. "Hello? I could smell something cooking from here, and it smells wonderful." Wolfin kept coughing, but she enjoyed the scent and flavor with it. She hoped there was no trouble with her meeting them like this.

[Professor Zobot]

The sound of treads rolling along asphalt could be heard approaching the house from inside. It soon ceased, to be replaced by the voice of a young boy talking into a loudspeaker. "Dat Yummy smell will be w'all mine! Sirr-ren-dur nows an' I'll shoot!"

Outside the house stood a hulking behemoth made nearly entirely out of Lego. Riding on top of it was young Timmy Prescott, (Age 6) the current youngest Mad scientist in the country. He raised a rainbow-colored mechanical arm up at an open window, pointing a humongous gun nearly as large as the window itself at Gamesy. "Well, whadda say?"

[runingwolfin]

"Um... I believe you mean surrender now OR I'll shoot." Wolfin walked up to the lego behemoth. "I believe they will share with all of us, so it doesn't have to be yours alone." She gave a smile which showed her white fangs. It looked more menacing than welcoming, and she was trying to be welcoming. She sat down close to the legos, and watched to see what the people inside would do with the young mad wanting their food also. She licked over her fangs with all the thoughts of what could happen, and of several inventions that she would work on back in her new lab. She wanted to eat the new food before all of that, though.

[Desius]

Ever walk in on something you weren't expecting?
That awkward moment when you can't decide to ignore it and keep on going, or simply back yourself out and in some cases run for the hills?

Joe held down the mans arms, and Bob had flung himself over the man's feet as he thrashed. Gamsey stood over him with a blood stained apron, and the largest, most wicked carver knife imagined, humming gently as the miniature cold fusion device powered the blade.
Several things happened at once.
Joe simply shrugged and went back to the task at hand, holding the man down.
Bob sputtered, looking back and forth between the boy and the lady wolf, before sputtering, "This... this isn't what you think!"
Gamsey just looked and clapped his hand together, careful of the knife and squealed, "Customers!"

Earlier.
"Now, now, my large friend," Bob smiled his brightest at the hulking figure sitting at the bar. Gamsey had promised to shrink his debt if he played barkeep for the grand opening while he focused on modifying his kitchen.
Whatever he was cooking, it smelled delicous.
"The sign says," The man argued, "Everything is free tonight."
"Well, my illiterate friend," sighed Bob, losing a touch of his signature friendliness, having argued for the last twenty minutes with this idiot, "The sign specifically states that alcohol is not. It is however dollar draft tonight, with the first glass of Gamsey's homebrew being on the house."
"But it said everything-"
"Look, man," snapped Bob, still smiling wide, "You have a five dollar tab. Five dollars! If you don't have it on you tonight, fine, let me just write your name and address down and you can pay it next time you come around."
"But it said everything is free," Grumbled the man, reaching for his wallet.
Bob rubbed his temple and shot a glance at Joe.
Joe shrugged. He had his own problems.
"I want that." the man pointing at plate steaming on the back counter.
"Hrmh." joe said taking a look and shaking his head sagely.
"What do you mean, you don't think I'd like it?"
Joe shrugged.
"Look here, I am the newspaper reviewer, and if I don't get quality service, your little dive of a hellhole isn't getting a good review. And my review means something. You've already hurt your store enough, now get me my order!"
Joe shrugged, and scribbled on his pad, the prick couldn't say he didn't warn him.
"And make it snappy." barked the reviewer, turning to his date. "You see darling, you just need to show these little 'gourmet' chefs who's boss."
"Hrrmph." Joe grunted, pinning the order up.
"Coooommmmin'" Gamsey called out, snatching the ticket. "Ooooh, I guess the Xenomorph ambassador to Mars, simply loves that take out. Hmm... I think I have enough eggs left for anothe order. Be careful Joe," warned the chef with a giggle, "Keep the Ambassador's food well away from everyone elses. If one of those eggs gets mixed in by accident...." Gamsey giggled and went back to work humming at the thought of the bloodshed.

[Professor Zobot]

Timmy looked over at the suspiciously furry woman as she smiled at him. It's said that every human being is born with the capacity for fear. It's one of the basic modes of human emotion, something instilled within each newborn babe. Timmy, however, had been Mad since birth, and the Mad psyche operated under different rules. Giggling maliciously, he pointed up the gun barrel of his Legomech's left hand at the werewolf, and the streams of a dozen supersoakers burst forth from it, pelting her with water all at once.

"You can't tell me what to do! Or what to say! I'm bigger than you! Mahahahahahaha!" Standing tall on his big plastic robot, he jumped down inside it and closed the lego-hatch, beginning to pump the first of 12 supersoakers inside the left arm. The right arm remained pointed at the men. The kid's voice echoed from within his ride. "Gimme all yer food or else!"

[blazerflarey]

OOC: do not expect runingwolfin to post anything before 11:00 A.M. at -4.0 hours from the GMT. meaning no posts before 4 hours and 10 minutes from now. By the way runningwolfin is my younger sister. Seeya.

[chicgeek]

Hey, Des? I think you asked a while back about the restaurant name?
Gamseys-i.e. game. Game, as in anything you hunt down and kill.
*Anything*
How's that?

[runingwolfin]

Wolfin shook her fur as dry as she could get it. Water was not one of her things to like every day. Today was one where she didn't like it, and she moved behind a tree. "Yes. I am happy to be a customer as long as you are willing to serve the food a little under cooked for me. It smells great, and if there's good enough food, I would be happy to tip." She proceed in shaking herself off, and jumped into the tree until she was invited it. She didn't pay any attention to the man that was being held down by the two. She did keep her eyes on the one with the knife, but that was because that knife WAS a weapon...

She was still dripping water, and she was not happy with that little brat. She started muttering to herself about his machine. "Legos are not that sturdy... If the thing is mostly legos, then it will have a bunch of week spots, but where would they be? Ah... They would be closer to the bottom due to the weight of all the other legos on top, but the top ones might be weak if they aren't layered..." Wolfin started sketching some numbers and stats into the tree's branch.

[Desius]

"Ohhh," giggled the jolly chef as he clapped his hands, his ample belly bouncing with glee. "Perfect, perfect,I have just the sugary concoction of sweet delight I've been saving for someone who could truely understand it's delicate perfection!"
"And not go Mad during the sugar rush," he coughed gently into his apron. "And you, good... lady? ...Wolfish person," Gamsey beamed, "I have succulent, artful tender meat of the rarest variety all free tonight as my opening special and de-"
"GAMSEY!" Bob shouted as the critic raved under him."LITTLE HELP HERE?!"
"Now, now," Tisked Gamsey, shaking his head, smiling at his new guests. A small twitch at the corner of his eye the only thing betraying his irritation, "Let me deal with our newest guests. Poor Mr. Whatchamacallit, or whatever his name was," Gamsey said idly dismissing the man with a wave of his hand, "Will be fine after he passes the xenomorph food through his system."
"HRRRMPH!" Joe grunted a bit disturbed at the distended skin. He could swear he saw a face or two moving under there.
"Perfectly normal, perfectly normal!" Gamsey cried reaching over the counter. He smiled at his new guests as he flourished two wrapped suckers.
"Who wants a candy?"

*Feel free to make up the weirdest and craziest tastes for the suckers. This is Mad candy made with Science!

[runingwolfin]

Wolfin walked up to him, and grabbed one of the suckers. "It has in interesting and not to sweet smell to it." She placed it into her mouth, and tossed the shimmering blue wrapper on to the little kid's machine. She couldn't help but try to bug the young mad. Wolfin spit the sucker out from the over powering flavor of a rare yet extremely sour plant. Her face looked quite pleased as she looked at the lolly that she now held in her paws. "How did you ever manage to make a candy that could match something as purely sour and rare as that is amazing!" She was more careful about eating it now, she started to lick it and avoided just shoving it back into her mouth. She pulled out a ten, and placed it on the counter for now. If the rest of the food was as interesting and good as this, she might be leaving a much bigger tip than she thought.

((Well, I'm glad she didn't die from the pure sourness of the plant... she also forgot to mention that the bugs that get near the plant die from just getting close to the powerful sour, and that most humans wouldn't be able to taste it as the sour would make their mouths numb. Her mouth went slightly numb as she just shoved the thing in her mouth))

[Professor Zobot]

Timmy took a blue sucker flavored to taste like quantum singularity, and took a slurp. Suddenly, he blinked out of existence, popping into reality again on top of some shelves, knocking over several cans and jars in his emergence. "Huh? It's sweet!" He licked the lollypop again, vanishing once more, only to appear randomly above the werewolf, whom he promptly landed on.

[runingwolfin]

Wolfin lost her sucker when the young mad landed on her. She didn't have time to think as she acted on auto. She Shook the kid off, then pounced at him like he was a deer or something. She finally realized what she was doing, and Changed her angle of trajectory so that she didn't actually hit the young mad. She just wound up hitting her head on the ground instead. "Ow. Well, I can do a head stand." She gave a chuckle to hide her embarrassment.

[Desius]

Gamsey pulled up on his ample tummy, huffing with a fit of determination. He reached over the counter and grabbed his bottle of water he kept to keep things clean. He Strode with a feirce determination to Wolfin and his other young guest.
"Young lady," He coo'ed, lifting her up easily, his bulk hiding the muscle underneath. "Bad Girl!" He snapped, spraying her nose with the bottle twice in quick sucession. "We do not, and I repeat this, DO NOT attack guests here." He firmly rubbed her nose on the boy before giving her a playful pat on the head and sitting her at the counter with another sucker.
Joe and Bob lflashed a look at each other, the Resturant critic settling down into a quiet moaning huddle.
"Umm, Boss?" Bob ventured while Gamsey picked up his other guest and put him onto his own chair.
"Yes, my good servant?"
"I think you only rub a dog's nose in it if they make an... accident I think."
"Nonsense," Gamsey said moving to his refrigerator, "How else are you supposed to train them?"
"Now," Gamesey said with a grin bropping a bowl infront of the young boy, "Who wants eyes' cream*."
"Joe," commanded Gamsey, still smiling at his guests, "Take the grill, one order of steak please. Give her a treat, vorpal rabbit, on me."
"Hrmph."



*Made fresh daily. From real eyes!

[runingwolfin]

Wolfin sat there wiping at her nose. "Doing that doesn't train a normal dog anything. Even when they make an accident as your assistant put it." She sat more upright as she heard something about a rabbit. Wolfin pulled something out of her back pocket. It was a little metallic square. She started working on it to see if she could make i work. "Oh, and I was meant to be a human turned into a full blooded silver wolf. Very high respect to those creatures." Her tongue stuck out of the side of her mouth as she worked.

[Professor Zobot]

Eager to avoid the wolf-creature's attention until he got back in his lego-mech (It's teeth were as large as small knives!), Timmy turned up and nodded. "Yeah! Eyes-Cream! Lemme have some!"

[Desius]

"Nonsense," Gamsey said, twirling the cream in the bowl, and wandering over to the freezer. "Now, see here," He said gesturing with the spoon as he pulled 387 different flavors and quickly placed small scoops around a massive glass bowl, on top of a peeled banana or five.
"I rubbed your nose in it." he said layering fudge, caramel, and a variety of special sauces of his own concoction. "And gave you a spay or two of water for good measure."
"Now you know better than to pounce at one of my customers right?" Gamsey said, muffled by the heavy lead apron and mask he wore as he carefully lifted one of his "special" green cherries out of his lead box, placing it gently on top of the Death by Sundae.
"So how can you say it's anything but effective?" he questioned, Bob and him laboring under the four foot monstrocity and placing it in front of his stunned guest.
"Now to see on that steak." Gamsey muttered. "I'm, sorry did you want any mashed potatoes and gravy with your steak." he asked happily, pulling the masher out from under the counter. "I do hope so. I love how they squeal when we mash them."
He giggled at the thought.

[runingwolfin]

"I said ordinary canines. Who said I was ordinary. Mashed potatoes sounds nice to go with my steak. I believe you mentioned something earlier about a blazerflary? I heard he can be a pain in the neck." Wolfin looked up from her little box, and watched the eyescream being made. She gave a chuckle as she remembered the last time she had some. She looked back to the task she had at hand, and the little box started ticking. Wolfin didn't seem to care, though.

[Desius]

"Ordinary canines, pashaw," Dismissed Gamsey bring out a plate with a massive slab of t-bone steak, and a special bowl of vorpal rabbit stew.
"What do you know." Gamsey said thwacking the stew with a spoon as it burbled "Whats up doc?"
"You are close to a Canine yourself dearie." Gamsey said gentle, picking up his masher as the fresshly boiled potatoes mourned and whimpered from the scalding heat. They screamed weakly as he started mashing them, mixing in his garlic and special herbs, only a couple glowing with an inner light.
"How so?" she growled.
"You're half man, and half wolf." Gamsey explained, "That sounds like dog to me."