Comics by Shaenon II

Mad science has never been so cute!
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:54 am 
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Location: Xyon City
I'm in the castle. Strange, but the corridors are deserted. The passageways are all empty. I've looked in the dungeon already.

I guess the only way to go is up.

I'm starting to wonder where the Virus got these ideas from in the first place. Probably some sort of medieval fantasy fiction, combined with video games. By my reckoning, I should be coming on the highest floor by now. Just a few more stairsteps to go...

When I got to the top floor, the stairs flattened up to block all exit. Standing in front of me, was a 6-foot tall knight in armor. The knight was covered in-- no, make that made of Virus, and was clutching a long glowing sword.

Standing, the knight saluted with the sword. Then, as I willed another sword to appear in my hand, he moved in to attack.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 1:15 pm 
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Brilliant (but still Mad) Scientist
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Rubbing my neck, I see that SiB is laying unconscious on the floor again.

"As I was saying, we were in the base of the Maritian rebellion. We were confined to the same cell and Mr. Stevens was quiet. Now, I know Mad Scientists, and I knew what he was thinking. Ally with his captors or destroy them. It was obvious that the Martians we had encountered were against the current regime. They had been breaking in as well. How could we know if they were friendly towards us."

"Mr. Stevens was taken for questions. Hours later I was removed from my cell and put into a chamber like the one we're in now. Soon, Mr. Stevens was back and we had been excepted by the rebels. An alliance between us was made. We were to help upgrade their weapons systems and aid their attack on the current Martian government. I was to work along side the second in command, Ri-Xean."

"We got along well enough. She looked unlike the other Martians. I soon found out that her mother had been a Martian and her (air quotes)father(/air quotes) had been a human. It was obvious that he had also been a Mad Scientist who her mother allowed to experiment on her. He disappeared and was most likely killed. Her mother gave birth to her later. Her human inheritance makes her an outcast in current Martian society. The Martian government's views on both humans and Mad Scientists only added to her stigma. Eventually she joined the rebellion and gained acceptance within it. She passed through its ranks to her current position."

"One night, after I had upgraded the metal formula of their ships, she met me to walk me to my chambers. I of course politely invited her in. We talked for hours. Talked about our childhoods, shared our experiences of being outcasts. Her for her race, myself for being a "huge fibber"- due to my ability to see things from our shadow society. Afterwards... well... I'm human, and she's attractive, nice, and we had so much in common."

"-Our relationship ended when the rebellion failed. In a humongous battle with the Martian Space Navy we held our own, but in the end they had numbers on their side. We lost and I haven't met face to face with Ri-Xean again, until now. We've remained in contact though."

And once again, I see the look on my employers face. That look, he's thinking about what I've said. Working it out in his brain on how best to take advantage of the situation. I've seen it thousands of times, but it still frightens me.


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 Post subject: The best giant robot pilots are always the most whiny.
PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 2:24 pm 
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It's complete, and not a moment too soon!

Using the few remaining pieces of damaged electronic equipment, fused wiring, and chemical supplies I was able to salvage out of the two ruined labs I visited, as well as pretty much every piece of computer equipment in the MET's observational post, I was able to craft the single crappiest giant robot ever made. I call it Rubblebot, because most of it's exoskeleton is composed of pieces of rubble from the labs of Miss Narbon and myself. I'm not ENTIRELY sure how it works or why it doesn't fall apart, and I KNOW it's not spaceworthy, but as long as the Martian ships are within our atmosphere It'll do.

A single untested giant robot with no reliable promise of backup verses an alien armada; anyone can see this wouldn't normally work. While I have the advantage in speed and maneuverability, and a weaponry, they have a LOT more guns than I have. I just wish I had time to design armor plating for it. Or figured out where the energy leak was coming from. The only things that I'm halfway happy with are the weapon systems I adapted from broken tech in Miss Narbon's lab. I get inside the cockpit and seal the internal and external doors behind me, activating the flight systems and launching into the atmosphere. Fortunately, I'm not entirely doomed. While I have to hope that Miss Narbon, or someone else will be able to help in some undetermined way, I didn't come without a trump card of my own...

*The fight begins, as Rubblebot uses a sonic weapon from Jane's lab to freeze several warships in place as he trashes them*

While I was recovering in Professor Tinker's lab, I came across some papers regarding an interesting study on human behavior and how it related to performance in certain activities. I combined the information there with a device I found in Miss Narbon's lab that apparently could influence people's minds at a distance via the emission of some bizarre electric signal that the human mind was receptive to. The result was a weapon that, should I use it, temporarily turn me into the greatest giant-robot pilot ever. The only reason I'm hesitant to use it is because I didn't have time to shrink the range of effects so that it would only affect me. Nor do I know EXACTLY what will happen, or how long it'll last.

Unfortunately, I'm under heavy fire, and it doesn't look like anyone's coming to help me... *sighs* Very well then. Einstein help us all.

*David Toboz reaches down to the console of Rubblebot, as another Martian laser strikes his robot, knocking it to the ground with a loud booming noise. A black button labeled "Emo-nade" is pressed...and then, for a brief moment, he blacked out.*

It was remembered, later on, as the moment the earth cried. Rubblebot flashed grey for a second before emitting a wave of pure angst from its frame, spreading across the world and beyond, affecting even some of the more sensitive minds of aliens on planets nearby. For a few moments, policemen stopped and wondered if they were truly doing good things. Women about to get married suddenly started to agonize about the choice they were making, and stores the world over began selling out of anything in the color black. The writers and creative minds, always the most sensitive to such things, had it worst. Those within 80 miles of the Rubblebot felt compelled to write terribly depressing poetry. And then, a few minutes after it began, it ended. The people furthest away recovered first, the pulse of depression growing weaker the further it traveled. To this day, most people aren't quite sure what caused it.

Amidst the battle within the city, a giant robot, obscured by rising dust, began to stand up. The Martian warships held their fire, confused and disoriented, until they could get a clear shot.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The virus knight looked down at its diminutive foe, this man that had threatened its dominion. It recalled the contingency that had been installed into it, should its control of this realm be threatened. Reaching out to the remainder of infected memories, thoughts, and data it still possessed, it began a uniform reformatting, beginning the process of erasing everything still within its influence. Its masters had informed it that this might not destroy its foe, but it would at least prevent him from causing too much trouble. It glanced down at So It Begins.

"Engaging MET Self-Defense Program finalstand.app."

The knight raised its sword.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 5:44 pm 
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As Thaddeus finished his tale, I was (of course) lost in thought.
At the mention of Ri-Xean's past, however, I felt a pang of empathy go through me.
So she had lost her father, even. . . never got to meet him. And she was an outcast, a child of two disparate worlds. . . . not to *mention* that my faithful assistant, to whom I already owed my life to, had tender feelings for her.

The self-argument that had formed - to help, to hurt, to take control, to aid, to betray, to - mercifully silenced as I went over the facts.
And the fact was, that it was obvious what I had to do. What my nature, my blood, demanded that I do.

". . . Thaddeus, I want you to know something. Something that I would appreciate not going farther than here." I say softly, glancing at the unconscious form of So It Begins (who, it would seem is now going on about castles and monty python jokes). He is assuredly asleep.

"I am, as all your previous employers were, obviously a mad Scientist. This leaves me prone to doing amazing, impossible, usually malicious things yes. But I am actually. . . well." I pause, wondering how to explain.
\
"My Parents were both mad Scientists before me. But my father was. . . he was a Good Mad Scientist. He worked with the government. That leaves me. . well, semi-begin, mostly."
I have turned away now, staring out of the window without seeing anything. It is. . . hard to talk about my father. Even after all these years.
Mostly, aside from my . . . incident when I went Mad, and a attempt to take over the school system with GRUES (heh heh heh), I've limited myself to low-level villainry. Dramatic, yes, but few-to-none hurt.

"So you can, perhaps, trust me when i say that I will devote myself to Miss Ri-Xeans cause sincerely. No tricks, no double-crossings, no attempts to take over the world through them." I turn to face him, smiling very lightly.
"But if anyone asks, after this all is over, this was all purely selfish and I had a B-Plan in the works anyways." [/i]

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 7:57 am 
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Swords in hand, we clash. I thrust and parry, the reclaimed units helping me against the Virus. The knight-Virus seems to block everything I do. I'm going to need a bit of an edge.

Suddenly, the entire castle shakes. It's as if there was an earthquake. As soon as I can maneuver myself to the windows, I take a quick peek out. It's not good. From the far edges (which are fortunately some distance away), the land is starting to break up. It's obvious what's happening. The virus ordered a complete reformat of Prime. And if I get caught in it...

I'm going to have to work harder, and if the Virus can mess that much with the environment, I can too. While I'm sending sharp, glowing discs flying at the virus, I also... Oh no.

As I've been distracted, thinking, the knight has taken the opportunity to push in on me. Now, I'm up against the wall, and the knight's moving forwards all the time. There's only one way to go.

Up.

I think a hole in the roof, above where I'm standing. Then, I close my eyes and jump.

On the roof, I get a bit of a breather as the Knight works his way up here. This lets me see what's happening. Portions of the land are disappearing, and the giant earthquake feels even stronger now.

The knight's figured it out. He jumps up here too. Soon, our blades are locked. Whatever I throw at him, he dodges.

This is not good.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:22 pm 
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Well, I guess my two choices are--

WHAM. Suddenly, I'm submerged with a wave of angst and depression... what's the use of the container I'm holding? It probably won't work anyway. The only real thing that could do anything is to surrender. To give up. To-- WHAT THE H*LL AM I THINKING?!?!

What was that?! It seemed like a... wait, that was transmitting on the same signal as MY mind control device!

If it isn't my mind control device.

Well, I know what I have to do now. I pick up the container, and head towards the center of town, sneaking around Martian patrols and residual war zones. If I can get to the center--

"Put your hands up and come with us."

The voice has a sort of filtered quality to it, and the gun pressing into the back of my skull doesn't help my suspicions any. I turn slowly, my hands in the air.

It's a Martian patrol. And I've just been caught.

_________________
"My conscience is feeling all prickly."
"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 4:58 pm 
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After Professor Tinker made the decision to aid the rebellion, we told Ri-Xean. Both of us aren't sure if he really won't turn on us, but he seems sincere, and that is the risk you always take with Mad Scientists.

We have prepared the rebel forces and are heading for Earth. It will take a while, even with the modifications to the Martian designs from my first encounter... and the ones currently underway. Of course, linking the ships slows us down as well, but we are getting around to most of the ships.

Even so, the rebel forces, though bolstered since the last outbreak, are significantly smaller than the Martian Space Navy. I can only hope that, we will receive some aid from the surface.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:34 pm 
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Thaddeus and X-Rean obviously don't quite trust me, but accept my help none the less.
And honestly, I can't blame them. As I once put it to a friend of mine in high school, 'no matter how much they agree to help, a Mad Scientist is still always Chaotic'. Hell, I hardly know what I'm doing most regular days. . . once I went to get some toast and I ended up storming the local pet store for subject matter. . .
Good times.

However, I mean to prove my willingness to aid the cause, taking the time it will take to get to our destination in learning the Martian language, something which doesn't take too long. It's a little rough to pronounce with the proper accent, but the written language is really very elegant.

Miss X-Rean is very helpful in informing me of the various capabilities of the ships. . . and in return I did my best to hide my dismay at the low destructive capabilities.

". . . Well, Miss X-Rean, perhaps I could see what I could do about the capabilities of this ship, and of your offensive supplies? Mechanics aren't really my expertise, but I think I know how to get the work done."

She asks me how I plan on doing this, and I smile innocently.

"Easy. i wake up So It Begins, who *can* fix things. You see, we have been warring on and off for a few months prior to this- we truced for the duration of this war busyness- so I happen to have an uncontaminated sample of his nano-machines." I exposition, digging the capsule out of my pocket.

I afix it to a syringe, and go through my jacket for nything else that could be usefull. . . . hmm, strength serum? No. Camoflauge juice? Nnnnooo. . . .
Fluffy chirps, poking his head out of one of my pockets, holding out a very tiny vial of dangerously blue . . . well, I guess it's a semi-soldid, really.

"Perfect! Thank you, fluffy." I chirp, adding it to the syringe casually.

"Ah, boss, just what *is* that stuff?" asks Thaddeus nervously, as I prepare to inject it into So It Begins jugular vein.

"Omni-Antivirus. I made it after a bout of frustration with getting the flue. Cures most deseiises, bad mental states, and anything up to a mortal injury. I figure that mixing it with the uncontaminated nano-machine sample will give So It BEgins the edge he needs in his inner battle."

X-Rean seems calmed by this explanation, but Thaddeus. . . well, he's worked with Mads before.

"Dr.Tinker, will that actiually *work*?" he asks, looking pained.

I giggle giddily, grinning widely "I haven't the faintest Idea!" I cheerfully squeal, injecting So It Begins.

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PostPosted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 10:14 am 
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At the center of the angstplosion, the effects had been terrible. For years after the battle, plantlife in the region would only grow in shades of black and gray, and statistically, any animals living in the region would have a much higher suicide rate than anywhere else in the world. And within the cockpit of the Rubblebot, its pilot had changed. The power of negative thinking had altered most his hair, which had darkened to a thick black color, and grown to a level most would describe only as "disturbingly effeminate." He hung his head low, not even looking at the viewscreen in front of him.

"None of this really matters. Everything's so pointless. I'm going to lose this battle anyway." The only thing stronger in his mind than the unrestrained existential depression was the violent, homicidal rage that came with it. "I hate war... there's no point to this... it's all my fault. I suck." He looked up at the viewscreen and snarled as a Martian laser flew over his robot's shoulder. "And you all just won't leave me alone!"

The Rubblebot flew forward, dodging oncoming laser fire almost effortlessly, and latched onto one of the closer warships, pounding into its hull over and over again with giant fists. "YOU CAN'T UNDERSTAND ME! NO ONE SEES HOW I FEEL!" As the hull gave way, shrapnel rained down into the ship's energy core, making it grow critical. Rubblebot swung the ship around and tossed it into another one just as it exploded, destroying both of them as well as several other nearby ships. The remains of the decimated vessels rained down on the city below, conveniently missing most of the not-yet-destroyed buildings but squashing a small, yet significant, percentage of the invading Martian ground troops. Rubblebot raised its arms in the air as it's pilot did. "All this death is on my hands! Nothing can ever make up for it! I'm worthless! I'm pathetic...I should go cut myself." Rubblebot flew towards the nearest ship, as its pilot was still looking for a way to vent his self-destructive rage by destroying other people.

The remaining armada, still possessing overpowering numerical superiority, began to regroup in the wake of the dramatic, whiny avatar of death that had been unleashed upon it. Most of the ship captains were honestly not sure what to do. The Martian fleet admiral (or the alien equivalent of a fleet admiral, anyway) was contacted for orders.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:13 pm 
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They found the canister immediately. That wasn't surprising (it's two feet high and 1 foot on each side). I'm just lucky I got the tool belt and the headset to go stealth mode quick enough. Time to break out the old manipulation tactics.

"What is this?" says the armored Martian trooper.

Hmm... it might be for the best if they can think that activating this thing is bad for the people of earth. Adjust my body language slightly to hint that I'm lying, adopt an innocent tone of voice...

"Nothing," I say.

"You're lying," says the Trooper.

Hmm. Maybe that was a standard response. I don't know. Let's see... ok. This object is part of a system that will emit rays that fog human minds. Yes, that sounds good. Adjust the body language to hint that I'm lying, but trying not to show it. Keep the tone of voice.

"Well, it's part of this doomsday machine thing that we're working on," I say.

The trooper pauses for a moment, then yells, "LIAR!"

I mentally grin. It's working perfectly! Let's see... change body language to scared, but still visibly lying. Match the tone.

"I swear, I swear, it really is!"

The trooper braces up for another yell. He's stopped by another one.

"Fyll, ENOUGH! You're out of order." Then, to me, "Ignore him. He's been a bit... ready-to-fly-off-the-handle lately. We're just curious what that is that's all. Nothing big."

I'd laugh out loud, if I wasn't appearing to be relieved. I know this one-- it's Good Cop, Bad Cop! Let's see... look to be still scared of the other one, but friendly/relieved/possibly bargaining towards this one. This is actually kind of fun!

"Well, ....... you promise you'll let me go after I tell you?"

The nice trooper sighs. "I have to check," he says, "but I think I can swing it with Headquarters. He steps away and starts a communications transaction. This gives another opportunity for Mr. Bad Cop to heckle me, of course. Have they practiced this?

Mr. Good Cop steps back. If he wasn't in a full armor suit, I think he'd be smiling benevolently. Sure enough, I can go, once I say what it is.

Let's go for the Oscar. I go 'hopeful', take a deep breath, and launch into the spiel.

"Well, it's this thing I saw some men in suits were building, and they said this would cause lots of trouble, for the Army, and how it would help the 'Armada', whatever that meant. I saw this lying about, and figured that it might be worth something if I sold it to one of the local Mad Scientists, and...."

I let my voice trail off, turning red as if I'm embarrased.

The Martians look at each other. "The Armada!" one says. "Is this..."

The other nods. The troopers turn back to me, and Mr. Good Cop pauses a second. Then, he says,

"Show us exactly where you found this. Then... we will let you go free."

_________________
"My conscience is feeling all prickly."
"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:58 pm 
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This is not a fair fight. Whatever I do, the Knight counters, and whatever he does, I'm barely able to block it. I'm being steadily pushed back to the edge of the roof, and it's a sheer edge. To add to that, most of the land from the castle has vanished. Time to try that move I learned from 'The Matrix'.

I jump, thinking gravity temporarily a lot lower than usual. The idea is that I'll jump right over the Knight's head, maybe giving him a whack on the way for good measure.

What actually happened was that the Knight simply raised his sword. A field of energy shot out, right in my path. I bounced, sword flying out of my hand, and flew past the edge of the roof.

I barely managed to grab on. Now where had the Virus learned that?! It's the sort of thing I would do, but it's pretty unusual. It's as if I was fighting myself.

Oh, no.

It's obvious what happened: The Virus pulled my mental backup, the one I use for regeneration. For all intents and purposes, it is me, but faster, smarter, stronger. I'll need a miracle to defeat this.

Surprisingly, I get one. From the portal, a streak of blue light comes in. I think I've seen some of that before... in Professor Tinker's lair. Marked 'Omni-Antivirus'. The blue light homes in on me, then goes down to the ground, and soaks into... my sword. As the sword, now flaming blue, flies up, I grab on. I'm back on my feet.

Then the Knight starts laughing at me. With a distorted version of my voice. This is way too much. I charge forward, with my anger fueling the swing. Soon the knight is being beaten back, and large dents are appearing in its armor. Then I see an opportunity. I duck in under its sword, and thrust.

The Knight starts laughing, louder now. Little pieces of virus are starting to break off of him. "You think you have won? You can't see it, but the structure of me is through this entire landscape. By defeating me, you're making the land break up even faster!"

I don't stick around to hear his laughter grow fainter and vanish. I'm running for the stairs. The Knight was right. The castle's crumbling. I've run down the stairs to the third floor, and it's as if the earth itself is dancing. Then I remember the backup. I run back up the two flights of stairs, and over to the body of the Knight. It's mostly disintegrated by now, and I can see the backup peeking through. I grab the backup-- represented by a brain in a glass sphere-- and run back for the stairs again.

3rd floor. I had the staircase for the tower disintegrate behind me.

1st floor. The formatting wall has almost reached the castle. It's as if this place has a malevolent will of its own. I've had to detour around rubble or jump back from falling blocks countless times. And in a hurry. Now, just one staircase left...

Ground floor. The shaking has increased. It sounds as if the castle's falling in.

I lunged for the door, just as a critical beam gave a loud *SNAP!* Seconds later, the entire castle collapsed in on itself, just as the format reached it. In seconds it was no more, and I was running.

Now I just have to run across the rutted, torn ground, all the way back to the portal. As fast as I can. With a wall of infinite destruction behind me.

And I've only got 1 life left.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 2:04 pm 
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I've been Monitoring So It Begins Pulse, keeping tack of most of his vital signs. A punch in heartbeat, a flickering of the eyes, a tinge of sweat. . . .
My eyes go wide.
"Damnation! He's losing the fight! Fluffy, check my jacket for something."

Fluffy squeaks, raising an eyebrow.

"I Don't know just- wait!" I close my eyes, so as to better concentrate on the twin lines of though running behind my eyes. One is nonsense, the stray discharge of an unsound mind, but the other . . . .

So It begins foucuses on technology, which signifys what kind of a man, or boy as was likely the case, he was before he went mad. Technology indicates a prior foucus on computers, and Video games!!

"Ah-HAH!! Thats his metaphor, of course! Which means that judging by Video Game rules of story telling and drama. . . . he needs a power-up."

Fluffy hands me another small vial, containing only a single tiny, yellow speck glowing faintly.

Thaddeus blinks, peering at the vial.
"Professor, is that. . .?"

I nod happily, injecting the tiny yellow particle into So It Begins Jugular.

"Uh, huh. You must remember that my speciality, besides Literature, is Geeky monsters. I devised this to use on my Pirana Plants, and it should be applicable here as well. Only So It Begins can use it, as t should be delivered by the scant uninfected nanobots I gave him earlier."

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:38 pm 
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I'm running, but I can't keep up with the wall. It's about to over take me at every turn, and the whole hopping-across-gaps-and-pits thing isn't helping either. Soon, I'm going to be pretty irrevocably destroyed. I wish it-- huh?

From out of the portal far ahead, a glowing yellow dot shone. This got very quickly closer and closer until it resolved into a glowing yellow hovercycle. I got on and pulled away, full speed.

I'm finally at the portal. I've gained a bit, and... the portal's down. Great. Well, let's see about opening it again.

I set up this link to Prime so it needed a 50-digit password, in 10-digit segments. Here goes...

Got the first decade. Still plenty of time.

Second decade. The format wall is a bit closer now.

Third. Now I-- ooops, missed a digit.

Third. The wall is starting to get too close for comfort. In another minute, It'll be here.

Fourth. I've almost got it...

GOTCHA! All five!

The portal glows, then opens. This will be tight. I grab the scooter and pull myself thr--- THE BACKUP! I FORGOT ABOUT THE BACKUP!

With a few seconds left before the portal itself is consumed, I stretch out a hand. I can't quite reach it! Try again. Just a bit too far away. If I lose that.... one... more... try...

I lunged for the ball, grabbed it, then rolled through the portal, a second ahead of the format. Immediately after I'd rolled through, the portal exploded, as the final remnants of my computer, Prime, were consumed.

~~~~~~

Ok. Let's see. We're running on low resources for the time being. Not much I can do with my nanobots any more (for now). Time to wake up, but first, let's store this antivirus stuff and the yellow stuff that made up the hovercycle. Same goes for the backup.

Now, let's just check my mental buffers to see what my eyes and ears grabbed while I wasn't there.

Amazing! Professor Tinker's actually doing something GOOD?! When Prime is back online, I'll dump my memories to disk and see what the good Professor will pay in blackmail. Now, I'm glad all this is over. Back to reality we go, in 3... 2... 1...

~~~~~

I open my eyes. Wow. It feels strange to be back. Now, time to get an update on what happened while I was out.

I hope that the invasion force from Mars isn't about to destroy us all.

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 1:17 am 
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On my way to the fountain, escorted by several Martian troopers. Can't really believe my luck. At times like this, I'm glad I took that offer.

(long ago)

I was out of college then, and while looking for a job, I noticed a classified ad in the paper. It asked if you've ever been really good at stuff, or felt like you could do more with your life. About throwing off limits. The ad mentioned that all geniuses could apply at such and such an address... et cetera...

Seeing as I'd graduated summa cum laude, in Chemistry (with minors in Mechanical Engineering and Theater), I decided I fit the category, and went to apply. I had already decided not to follow Mom's profession some years ago, but the world was about to drop me into it anyway.

The address was an unremarkable single-story house, just another box in a sea of boxes. I knocked, and a voice yelled 'Come in!'

Inside the house was another matter. The place looked like a junk heap crossed with a mess crossed with a science lab. The voice belonged to an older woman, seated at a (surprisingly) uncluttered table. After some small talk, I mentioned that I'd come because of the classified ad. The woman explained.

The explanation was actually more of a disclaimer and license agreement. In short, it stated that by taking this apprenticeship that was offered, I would become removed from society, but I would become somewhat unbound as well. I would become... a Mad Scientist.

I stood deciding whether to take the offer for about 3 minutes. Did I really want to do this? Couldn't this be taught better by my parents?

Was I doing the right thing?

Then, so help me, I said yes. That was when my apprenticeship as a Mad Scientist began.

_________________
"My conscience is feeling all prickly."
"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


Last edited by Jane Narbon on Mon Apr 28, 2008 7:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 11:37 am 
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"So It Begins! You're awake! The Power-Up worked!" I cry in triumph, helping him to his feet.
He grin, shrugging slightly.
"I needed someone to fix the ships, and You;re better at that than me. Besides, I'M the only person that gets to decimate you. that goes for the Martian fleets, Jane Narbon, and the MIB." I say haughtily, recovering some dignity for having saved him.

I Fill him in on the situation, leaving out the bits where I agreed to help via my own will. He doesn't need to know about that. . . . unless, wel, I'll shoot that monster when it rampages.

". . . so as you can see, we need to work fast. We stand to keep the earth that rightly belongs to be fought over by Mad Scientists out of the hands of the Martians. Besides, If the rebels win, then the NEW martian government will be in *our* debt." I finish, picking up Fluffy and perching him on my shoulder.

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 Post subject: Day of the Deranged Do-Gooder: The End?
PostPosted: Sat Apr 26, 2008 12:49 pm 
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A little over half the Martian armada had been destroyed, either via the screaming Rubblebot or due to poorly aimed attacks meant to destroy David Toboz's Rubblebot. Panting heavily, he raised his robotic fists. "TAKE THIS! MY ANGER, MY DEPRESSION, and all of my...hoitiness? Woah, what the heck was I doing?" David Toboz's hair began to fade back to its original muddy brown, as a Martian laser winged the Rubblebot. "Ah yes, THAT was the reason..."

He glanced down at the command board and vigorously start pushing the "Emo-nade" button, to no avail. "Oh crap! How can it be dead? Darn it, how was I supposed to know that after one pulse this stupid thing would give up on life?" The distraction made the Rubblebot hold still just long enough to give a certain hapless Martian gunner the opportunity he/she/it needed. He/she/it powered up the experimental "Death's Head" laser battery on the armada's flagship, charged it up, and fired.

David Toboz didn't see it coming until just a second after it was too late. "OHCRAPTHISSEEMSVAGUELYFAMILIAR!" The laser bombardment shredded the Rubblebot, sending parts of building material raining down all over the city, and the core of Rubblebot entering freefall near the center of the town. The last remaining angstroms within his body slowed down time in the area around David Toboz, making his decent to earth take longer (Although not lowering the velocity due to freefall), allowing him time to monologue, as is required in such situations due to narrative casualty.

How did I into this situation? Why me?
Darn it, I don't know! This all seems so wrong...
I...I can remember so little of my life.
Distant, fuzzy memories of my early childhood,
and the brief day when I woke up buried in rubble.
But nothing in between. It's like I never really lived at all.
...perhaps that is it. Perhaps I'm not meant to exist.
This would be the universe's way of fixing it's mistake,
a final conflict between me and what is my fault,
wiping the slate clean. Except, I screwed up, didn't I?
I can't...even...fix...my own...mistakes...


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At the fountain in the center of town, Miss Narbon and her Martian escort encountered a group of five men in black suits! The lead one pointed a gun at her, looking respectfully over at the Martians.

"There, my master! SHE is one of the mad scientists of the region that we were told to destroy! Allow us to dispose of her now, and we shall prove our worthiness to become your stewards of earth, your Martian Knights!"

Just then, before anyone could react, the trashed, electronic skeleton of Rubblebot (Available in action figure form for $9.95! Comes with fun Battle Damaged Unconscious Pilot inside!) crashed to the earth, landing on top of the MET troops and crushing them to death. Around the center of town, bits of wall and ceiling from the former labs of mad scientists rained down to earth.


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PostPosted: Sun Apr 27, 2008 4:43 pm 
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I've been fixing rebel Martian ships, millions of miles from Earth.

Wow. Being a Mad Scientist means you sure get around a lot.

The repairs are mostly simple, though it's harder since Prime is only a shadow of itself (seeing as instead of in my lair's computer system, it's running at half power in my head). It's relatively easy. Relatively. Ok.

~~~

The entire fleet is repaired, augmented, and updated, and it's ready to go! Me, Professor Tinker, That Guy, and Ri-Xean will be riding in the flagship. I made sure to give it extra armor than usual.

Now, I just have to survive a large battle, and hope that my "last resort" keeps Earth from having to survive a small war.

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 27, 2008 8:47 pm 
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Well, So It Begins (with some help from me and Thaddeus) has gtten everything in Tip-Top shape.
But something is bothering me. I've got one of those headaches. . . I only get those when there's something dangerous in the air.
Something like foreshadowing. I hate that, dammit.

*sigh* Oh, well. It's too late now to do anything but hit my mark and say my line, as we used to say in Drama class.
With any luck, soon I'll be back home, with my experiments and my books. I've even got a student lined up to be my new assistant. . . .

. . . . . note to self, if my lab is in ruins because of Jane Narbon, send Fluffy over with some T-one sauce and a hunt to eat order on her wardrobe.

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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 7:55 am 
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As the robot came down, everybody's attention was focused on it. I was able to grab the canister and HIDE as the robot smashed flat against the ground, killing all the Martian troops. The remaining men in suits, on seeing that I've vanished, start searching under the leftover bits of robot.

I can't seem to stop the flood of reminiscences that remembering that classified ad dredged up. It's nice to remember... but there are some parts I'd like to forget.

(long ago)

The apprenticeship changed my life. I learned how to plot, how to use my chosen fields of chemistry and mechanical engineering to create devices beyond human ken, and the trademark maniacal laughter (yes, it's mandatory.)

The work was long and difficult, but at the end of it I had a complete grasp of everything a mad scientist really needed to know in the 'Creations' department. I also was trained in unarmed combat, just in case a creation went wrong-- or I didn't want to use creations to take someone down in the first place. Then, the woman (her name was Ileen, by the way) got around to the real meat of the 'course'.

My minor in Theater came in incredibly handy, as I learned how to lie. How to keep a straight face, or make my face and body display anything I chose. I learned the difference between real innocence and false innocence, and how to fake both. (Quick tip for false innocence: Try saying 'Who, me?' in front of a mirror.) Every trick of body language known to mankind. How to seem sincere.

I was well on my way to becoming a heartless, deceitful Mad Scientist. And I loved it.

Who said the apple doesn't fall far from the tree?

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"My conscience is feeling all prickly."
"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


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PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 1:10 pm 
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I can almost feel the air thickening. What's coming up next is a 'hinge point'. If things go one way, great. If they go the other...

I'm shattered out of my thoughts by a loud buzzer on the ship's console. We're under attack. By the entire Martian fleet.

Here goes...

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 Post subject: The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy, no more, no less?
PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 6:18 pm 
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I wake up, trapped inside the fused metal cockpit of my own trashed giant robot! Fortunately, it's nothing that a super strong robotic metal fist can't punch through! I create an exit from my contraption, and emerge from my metal cacoon.

"Ugh...where am I?" I shake my head quickly. "Oof. No time for confusion! That Martian armada is still up there, and-" I look up. "Wait... is that another Martian armada? It looks pretty dinky compared to the first one, though. I mean, even after all the damage I did, the invaders still have twice the numbers, and MUCH bigger guns. It looks like the two fleets are duking it out, though. I can't help but feel like I should help, but I've got no tech left that can fight something like that. Maybe I should just worry about the ground troops...hmm." I look around.

"Suddenly, a JANE NARBON appears! Options:
-Attack
-Parley
-Throw a rock at it
-Run away
"

I look down at my mechanical prosthetic. "Umm...robot arm, what the crap are you talking about? Oh! Is that Miss Narbon cowering behind that boulder? Hello Miss Narbon! Sorry about the whole 'attempting to bring you to justice' thing!" I wave. It's the only polite thing to do, even if she may still be working with the Martians.

"My apologies. I was merely running a video game emulator on some of my spare circuits, and data from my short-ranged scanners got mixed in, and...I just don't want to talk about it." I look down at my arm. "We're past that now, arm. Oh, and try and keep focused, ok?" I hop off the skeleton of the Rubblebot and jog over to Miss Narbon's location. "What are you up to? Oh, and which side are you currently not double-crossing?" I look over at my ruined creation, somewhat disappointed. "I don't think my robot over there is salvageable, unfortunately. So, uh, can you think of any places nearby where I can find any unused electronic gadgets or possibly old military surplus stuff? I only managed to trash half the Martian fleet and none of the ground troops. I've still got to fix things, avenge Dr. Tinker's death, write the biography of Jack Nickelson, and a lot of other stuff!"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Meanwhile, the robotic arm reluctantly closed the emulation file, and pulled up an e-mail account, "Rob.Arm@lerfjhax.com" Filling out the address of it's intended recipient, it wrote a quick message and sent out an email.

"H3h. H3h. H3h."[/i]


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 6:14 pm 
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Hmmm. This is an unexpected development. I think I'll just tell him what he needs to know, and leave it at that.

"Hmmm... for surplus stuff, you could try breaking into Professor Tinker's lab... I hear he imported some new stuff 'borrowed' from the Martians lately. He's sure to have hidden it well, though. You might have to break open some things to find them."

If the good Professor has any Martian technology in has lab right now, I shall be very surprised-- on the other hand, David Toboz here will have to tangle with Fluffy either now or later. Let's see his labcoat get eaten for a change!

This'll also get him out of here-- I'd prefer to keep the canister a secret for now.

Ah, I love being able to manipulate people. Isn't it so very... mad?

Heh

... heh

... ... heh.

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"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 6:37 pm 
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Oh, *&%$!!. We're being attacked!
And not only that, the alarm just went off on my watch, which means my lab is being broken into. But who would even want to.. . . ?
. . . Jane Narbon, damn her soul. Hope she bought a spare lab coat. . .
Honestly! Between forcing me to go n a date with her, kindnapping me, bringing the wrath of the Martian forces on us all, not to MENTION killing *my* rival. . . . .
I am getting VeRy AngRy with her.

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Last edited by FriendlyTroll on Tue Apr 29, 2008 7:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 29, 2008 6:49 pm 
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"Take stuff from Professor Tinker's lab? But that stuff isn't mine!" I pause. Should it matter? I mean, I took stuff from Miss Narbon's lab, and the MET base, but... but that was different! They were evil, and the stuff I took was more or less broken when I found it. But Professor Tinker was nice to me...he took me in, and helped me get better when I was all burnt and wounded. And now he's... "It just wouldn't feel right, Miss Narbon. I'd be robbing from someone after their death!" Miss Narbon blinks and then gives me an odd look, raising an eyebrow.

My robot arm bent up and gestured at me. "Beeeep. Level 3 biological wea-"

Miss Narbon gasped. "Weapons! I forgot to mention that the Martians are using biological weapons in their invasion! This area must already be contaminated!"

I looked around, nervously. "A-a-are you sure about that?" My arm folds itself and is muttering something indignantly. From what I've learned it doesn't like being interrupted.

"Positively. You'd better get out of here. It's really dangerous. Get to Tinker's lab. There'll be stuff there that can help us. Now GO! The fate of the world is at stake!" She's smiling. For some reason it makes me nervous when she does that.

"Well, alright. As long as you're sure you're safe..." I turn and run off, trying to remember where Tinker's lab is. I don't like doing this, but I guess I have to... especially when the world's in danger. The only thing that bothers me is this: I'm pretty sure as I ran off that I heard Miss Narbon laughing back there...


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:13 am 
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Have you ever been in a space battle? Really? It's not like a land battle or an air battle at all.

On land, you have to watch for foes coming from all four directions, not including from above. In the air, you have to check all six directions, but everything's still regulated by the pull of gravity.

Space is different. Any way is up. Actually, every way is up. So, while you can see in all directions, the real hazard is an enemy coming from above you, or below you. And you can be fired on from all six directions as well.

Unfortunately, this was my first space battle, and I was just finding this out. Our fleet was well-trained, and I had installed extra shielding (and weapons) in the command ship. Gradually, our fighters whittled down the main Martian fleet, all while avoiding getting shot themselves (and dodging the belt of orbital junk that is now a minor ring around the Earth. Haven't the people who design satellites/etc ever heard of littering?!)

As both fleets thinned out (theirs faster than ours, fortunately), our ship had taken a heavy battering. The battle seemed to be coming to a head, drawing to a conclusion.

Then I saw the command ship.

Five times as big as the others, carrying a bewildering array of guns and shielding, polished to a mirror shine, this was the command ship all right. A few lucky shots could end the war.

Then, I saw the electrical arcs around the main gun turrets. Railguns. ++not good. A few shots could end this war, all right-- just not in a way that would be very beneficial to me. I've got to get those shields down, and...

As we're dodging enemy fighters, my eyes fall on the metal micrometeoroids littering this region of space. Satellite junk. Litter.

Iron.

If I could somehow rig up a magnet... wait, they have to drop the shields to fire those big railguns, right? Oh-kay. Ready, set, GO!

The rebel command ship paused just long enough for the gunners on the Martian command ship to take aim. A fine spray of copper particles shot out of an aperture below the main gun. Then, the main gun shot a bolt of electricity that conducted along the path of atomized copper, earthing itself in the rebel command ship.

Of course, while this was going on, some nanobots had been released from our vessel, and latched on to the hull of the enemy's command ship. Their cellular-automata-based programming would command them to turn a thin outer layer of the ship's hull to iron, then magnetize the iron. Immensely.

Meanwhile, we were getting out of the way. The lightning bolt had really taken it out of our ship, and we needed to wait for the nanobots to work. Shields had dropped below 45%, when a strange thing started happening.

Some of the nearby junk-- screws, bolts, and metal shards-- began to move, all in the direction of the Martian command ship. Soon, the radius in which junk was moving grew larger. Soon, an entire meteor shower of metal bits was headed-- fast-- at the Martian ship.

Soon, the battle would be decided. Them... or us?

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 12:53 pm 
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I stand outside the late Professor Tinker's lab, trying to avoid the pangs of sadness. Out of everyone I had encountered thus far in this crazy world I woke up in, Tinker and his associate (and that bunny) had been the only people that had been nice to me. It didn't feel right, sneaking back in, even if he was dead. I'm just glad that he told me about the three keys kept under the welcome mat. If only I remembered which one was the "safety" key and which one would alert any of his creations inside. *David takes a key and turns it in the lock, and the door opens* Now then, Miss Narbon said there had to be something in here that could help fight the Martians... now if Professor Tinker was keeping some sort of weapon like that, where would he keep it? As I walk in, I pass by that laundry bot I built, the one I gave a mechanical goatee to. "Hey Laundrybot-2221!"

"Yesss...and his whites shall be mixed in with his colors! AHAHAHAHAHA- Oh, hello creator? Do you need anything folded?" It looks at me, it's tiny face grinning in a way that makes me edgy. "Err...no. Keep up the good work, I guess?" It's really quiet in here, though. I guess that little bunny went with the Doctor. There doesn't seem to be anything in here that could endanger me, at least...

"Mew."

Except Tinker's cat. I really, REALLY hated that cat, with it's weird grin. And now in addition to that, it's got claws out, and a disturbing glint in it's eye...eep!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"OW! OW! GET OFF ME! GET OFF ME! AUUUUUUURRRRRGGGHHH!" Things have gone from bad to worse. Tinker's evil cat is on top of my head, raking its claws through my flesh, and it isn't inclined to let go. It just won't listen to me, and I can't hurt it, it would be animal cruelty! If only I could-wait! I close my eyes and take in a deep breath. "YOUR CREATOR IS DEAD!"

The cat fell off almost instantly. I KNEW something that malicious had to be intelligent. I look down at it. "Really, it's true. I saw it happen myself... Professor Tinker went up into space in a rocket ship and a fleet of Martian spaceships destroyed his vessel. I...I didn't see any survivors. And now the Martians are invading, and I need something to fight them, and avenge your master's death...among other things..."

The cat frowns and turns around, running off and gesturing for me to follow with it's tail. It's kind of weird that it just trusted me like that. It lead me into Doctor Tinker's private bedroom, and now it's pushing some little box out from under the bed with it's head. I wonder what's inside?

"Interesting...is this... it looks like a hand grenade, except it's all covered in gold, and there's a cross for a pin. This note says it's for an emergency: 'Just in case it turns out Fluffy was plotting against me this whole time.' Weird! And this other thing... a CD? 'The Master's Thesis of Professor Tinker: As read by Peter Gennings'? Hmm... I guess that might be a dangerous weapon, if I know Doctor Tinker. I suppose one of these things might be useful against the Martians, but which one should I take? Hmm..."[/u]


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 2:30 pm 
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Cheshire sits back on his haunches, Grinning at the man who had come into his Makers Home.
"Take them both. Pull the pin and count to four, not three, or two. Five is right out." he says suddenly, speaking in an eerily deep voice.
He then hops up onto his shoulder, making it clear that he was going to go with him.
"Oh, and unless you *want* to go mad again, try not to listen to the Thesis."

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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2008 12:34 am 
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Aack. I could have handled that a little better. Also, I have to remember not to break out into laughter until some time later. No matter. The bracket lies before me, perfectly shaped to fit the canister. The memories are coming faster now.

This is it.

(long ago)

They say all good things must come to an end. My apprenticeship was headed for such an end-- a fiery one. I was practicing my hacking on my mentor's computer, when I came across a most unusual file. It was a specification on a 'Project BlueLight'.

I had been conned. The government had trained me-- but trained me to use me. I couldn't read after the first few paragraphs, as my eyes filled with tears. I had trusted this woman. Mother really would not have been proud.

I resolved to bide my time. My manipulation abilities would work on anyone-- the training I had received had seen to that. Now, I would use them to conceal the truth. I had never seen this file. I had never hacked Ileen's computer. I had never found any reason to turn on her.

That is what she thought.

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"A bit of absolute power can remedy that."
Kid Radd


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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2008 3:41 am 
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Ri-Xean invited me into her office. "Thadeus, I'm taking a squadron down to Earth to defeat the ground troops. I would like you to get Dr. Tinker and SoItBegins to come with us. I'm sure they will want to get back to their lairs and such."

"All right, I'll get right to it," I say.

-----------------------------------------------

Everyone's been gathered into the ship bay. We'll be down to the Earth soon.


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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2008 9:59 am 
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My robot arm tried three times to knock the cat off of my shoulders, but every time it just faded into nothingness and remained on. I guess that I'm stuck with this feline, for the moment, anyway. And I've got the two hidden surprises of Tinkers:

1) A weird looking hand-grenade, which is probably really powerful, but has a notably limited range. While I suppose it might be useful against a few ground troops, unless I can come up with a way to get it up into space, it's not going to be useful against those warships.

2) Tinker's Masters Thesis on CD, which apparently drives people mad when they listen to it. That's a powerful tool (even if I don't like the idea of having to make people insane) but I don't know if it'll even WORK on the Martians. Words have no power if the audience doesn't understand them.

So neither of them are really that useful to me, unless I get creative. "Hmm...a translator."

The cat looked up from washing it's paw. "Mmm?"

"A translator! It wouldn't make any sense for the Martians to speak our language. They probably came up with some sort of translation device for their ground troops. If I can find one somewhere, I bet I could integrate it with the CD player and Tinker's Thesis to make it play in the Martians language instead of ours. Then I'd just need a way to get it to play up in those ships of theres...maybe some sort of remote access hacking device?" The cat looked somewhat uninterested, and went back to cleaning itself. Well, it's worth a try anyway... the only place I can remember seeing Martian troops was back where I saw Miss Narbon, though.

I'll scurry on over that way and see if I can find on on their bodies. I might get lucky and find some on the way, though. I can work on figuring out how I'm going to transmit it on the way there.


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